Category Archives: conditioning

How to Know When You’re Being Conditioned

Here is a great video from Zeno (a Human Design Projector) about how to recognize when you’re being conditioned.  She starts by talking about how to recognize conditioning in the heart / will center and makes some suggestions about how to deal with it. Zeno brings up a very valuable question in this video.

“How are you reacting to being conditioned?”

Conditioning is a fact of life.  We are all conditioned, either by others or by the transits, all the time.  Awareness of how you are reacting to being conditioned is a key to successfully dealing with the Projector not-self theme of bitterness.  Mismanaged conditioning is a huge source of pain for all Human Design types.  And for Projectors it can fuel bitterness to the point where it throws you out of balance with your true nature.

In the Bitterness to Joy Program you get to explore how you are reacting to conditioning  in your life (past and present) in order to understand how it is fueling your bitterness.  

Is bitterness keeping you from your joy?

You’re invited to join us for the Bitterness to Joy Program!

A Major Epiphany from the Living Your Design Course

I just completed a special live Living Your Design course which was tailored to the specific issues of non-sacral beings (Projectors and Manifestors).  It was taught by Andrea Abay-Abay, a fellow Projector who is trained in Human Design training through Jovian Archive.  This course was extremely helpful for all of the Projectors who participated.  Some of us were well into our deconditioning process and some were new to deconditioning and Human Design.  All of us got immense value from the experience.  During the course I had a major epiphany which I will tell you about in a moment.Andrea AbayabayThe Living Your Design course is the introductory course for the Human Design System as it was originally taught by Ra Uru Hu.  It covers the basics of Human Design as it pertains to all design types.  So we learned about the strategies and decision making authorities of all Human Design types as well as the specifics of all of the energy centers.  What made this class unique is that Andrea made all of the information about other design types pertinent to Projectors.  Projectors are here for others, so it is crucial that we understand others.  It is also crucial that we understand how to manage ourselves in the midst of others.  This includes being aware of how we are susceptible to the conditioning of other energy types.  

While the information was very familiar to me (I am a certified Human Design Specialist through Human Design for Everyone) I had a major epiphany during the course which put me on a whole new level of empowerment.  I had been going through some family stress and conflict which reached its breaking point during the course.  At the point where I felt that I couldn’t endure it any more I suddenly realized that what was going on had nothing to do with me.  The awareness of how I was absorbing and amplifying the conditioning field in my environment catapulted me into a new empowered stance in my relationships with the two Generators in my household.  I gained the clarity I needed to assertively refuse to take on the discord between my family members.  The effect was a palpable shift between these two Generators who were in conflict in my household.  I’m not sure if they actually resolved their conflict, and quite frankly I don’t care.  But the energy changed in the house when I changed how I deal with them.  My experience of them shifted in a dramatically positive way.

Projectors are here to guide the Generators in their lives (when invited), and I was reminded ofmanvsman my very important role in my Generators’ lives.  This did not mean that I had to be their referee or their conflict resolution specialist (as I had attempted to be in the past.)  It meant that I had to be aware of the conditioning that they receive from each other as well as the conditioning that I receive from them, and manage myself by recognizing that what is theirs is not mine.  The Living Your Design Course helped me to do that by the way that we spent time on each of the types and the conditioning in all of the centers.  Something just clicked and I’m glad it did.

Andrea will not be doing this live course for a while, but she does do a private Living Your Design program for people who want individual attention.  And she does also plan to make the live course she just did into an audio download.  I will be sure to let you know more about her upcoming offerings as they become available.

Riding The Wave

Guest Post

Originally Written: April 28, 2012 by Ethan Emerson

Surfer on a WaveAfter taking the last 2 months to isolate myself from as much conditioning as possible, living an eventless life purposely to allow myself to settle into my body and really feel what it’s like to be who I am… I’ve actually come to have some very surprising experiences. Conceptually I always got that nothing others do or say creates the way we feel – we are always the source of our emotions (yes, even if someone punches me in the face if I feel anger it’s not because of being punched in the face) however, there was a dilemma. Was I really choosing my emotional state? I don’t remember consciously choosing what I feel, ever. And now I’ve gotten to the bottom of it.

Emotions really are just chemistry! Literally. There is no cause for feeling sad, lonely, angry, disappointed, happy, elated, etc. it is literally just chemistry. It’s not enough to say that something happens and then we choose how to respond. We don’t choose how to respond. Not consciously, anyway. It just happens like a knee-jerk response. Why? Because we identify with our emotions.

I have a defined solar plex, and so I have my own emotional wave that gradually ratchets up – then gradually ratchets down and completely crashes, and this is just chemistry. No big deal, except to witness the big crash as the passenger – oh, that’s something else. That’s quite an experience. To witness the end of the crash without identifying with it – the doors that just opened for me are incredible.

I am not my body, I am not my emotions, and now I clearly see how this emotional wave just repeats on a cycle over and over – and when I’m climbing up or down on my wave if I am attached to identifying with the emotions that pass through my body, I think that circumstances and people around me are contributing to and/or causing my heightened feelings labeled desirable/undesirable but that’s not the truth at all.


Saying that emotions are “just chemistry” is not the same as saying “I am responsible for how I feel, and I can feel happy in any circumstance, even if I’m in prison or being faced with torture.” No. Emotions being pure chemistry is different than taking “responsibility” for how I feel. Taking “responsibility” for my emotions is another not-self mindtrap – I am not responsible for the emotions that pass through my body at all. And the more I try to trick my mind into believing I am, the more I will be misled to believe that I somehow have control over the emotions that pass through my body. Clearly, I do not. It is just chemistry and it goes up and it crashes down and I am not in control.

What does that mean? Nothing, really, unless I choose to make it mean something. But at the end of the day all it really means is that the emotional wave always has and always will continue to rise and fall and I am just along for the ride. Where’s the freedom in that? Well, by not identifying with the emotional wave and getting that it is just chemistry, I can coexist with the emotional wave and just take a backseat to all of it. Just watch it. Observe it. Be the passenger. Not try to change or control it in any way. “Oh, look, there it goes…”

The sentiment that we are somehow “responsible” for our emotions implies choice in the way we feel. The truth is there is no choice – there is only chemistry. And in recognizing that all there is, is chemistry – that’s where the true power of freedom comes… to be the passenger… the power is not to choose happiness in the face of sadness. That’s just adding on more layers of bullshit to your original bullshit. You can’t control it. The power is in not identifying with the emotions in the first place, and, despite what you feel in your physical body, maintaining your flow of allowing it all to just be. Not labeling it wanted or unwanted. Just ride the wave – you can’t change it!

Want to learn more about your emotions and the emotional wave?  

Check out the Projector Survival Study Program!

Guest Post – Does Anyone Really Believe This Stuff?

You know how Human Design Projectors really light up when they get invitations?  Did you know that we also light up when giving them?  I was minding my business on Facebook… I mean like literally doing some business postings … when I received an invitation to Like the page “Human Design Projector”.  I love invitations and this one lit me up, so I went over there and liked the page.  I perused some of the posts and discovered a bunch of links to articles which looked really good.  But when I clicked on them they actually took me back to an error page on this site!  Imagine how confused I was at first.  I hadn’t written them, but I really really wanted to read them.  I posted an inquiry on the Human Design Projector Facebook page and got a comment back from the author who had since moved on.  Turns out he was the prior owner of this very site!  He graciously posted the articles for me to read, and I loved them so much that I invited him to allow me to give them a home here on the site where they originally lived.

This is the first of those articles.  Please enjoy, be inspired and know that you are not alone!

questionDoes Anyone Really Believe This Stuff?

Written December 31, 2011 by Ethan Emerson

Throughout my life of 31 years as I write this post, I’ve come across many helpful systems and tools that have allowed me to grow and transform my life in ways I never dreamed possible. Many who have witnessed just the last 3 years of my personal transformation have just been in awe of all that I have accomplished and have said that they have never seen ANYONE accomplish the growth I have in such a short period of time, or even in one lifetime. I’m thrilled to be recognized and acknowledged for my progress, and that recognition is the fuel for my fire!

… and yet it’s completely not-self, all the recognition is not me, nor is it real. All I did was act like a Generator, go-getter to get this, get that, accomplish this and that, for what? And who cares? Meaningless praise… for someone I am not.

With that said, I want to address an important question that comes up often, not just in reference to the Human Design System, but any system, concept or tool that has any hint of other-worldliness to it. By other-worldliness I simply mean that which cannot be scientifically measured and unanimously agreed upon in the scientific community.

The question is about BELIEF. Many people say they don’t BELIEVE in Human Design, or they don’t BELIEVE in astrology. My point of view is that when I’m presented with a system, strategy or tool – if it works for me I’ll use it, and if it doesn’t work for me I won’t use it. I don’t need to believe in something for it to work or not work. I simply need to try it – test it – and it either works or it doesn’t.

I usually find a balance between utilizing different elements of many systems. I’ve never found a tool that I believe to be true. I simply don’t believe in constructs to start with. I believe my truth, and that’s all there is. And even that is ever changing.

There are aspects of Human Design that I don’t resonate with, one being that I don’t take for a fact the statement that it takes 7 years for everyone to decondition themselves since the day they begin learning about HD, because one does not need to be consciously aware of the HD system to begin deconditioning. I’ll give you one example. I have a friend who is a Projector whose design is 90% identical to my own. We share more than we don’t share. She is beginning her deconditioning process alongside me, and yet before she learned about HD from me, she had no label to apply to her experiences. She still hasn’t had any interest in learning about HD, and yet, inherently inside of her is the intuition to make decisions as an emotional authority Projector. She does it better than I do. I’m the one learning from HER and she doesn’t even know anything about Human Design.

I did a great deal of deconditioning prior to even knowing Human Design existed, so when I got my chart read it was fun listening to aspects of the way I used to be, knowing consciously that I have truly transformed my life in ways that most people struggle with for a lifetime.

Back to science for a moment…

When something is accepted as undeniable concrete scientific fact, people don’t need to directly experience it to believe it. In fact, there are many instances where people have directly experienced something yet still believed the opposite just because science said it was true.

The best example of this is when Galileo suggested that the Earth revolved around the Sun. The Catholic Church along with all of their followers believed the Sun revolved around the Earth. Prior to the church admitting their mistake, people were experiencing the Earth revolving around the Sun yet believed it was the Sun revolving around the Earth.

What we believe is not necessarily true; what is true doesn’t require belief in order to be experienced. Galileo’s story proves how easily we can be experiencing a reality we don’t believe to be true.

Do you believe in God? Do you believe in Jesus? Do you believe in aliens? Do you believe in telekinesis? Do you believe in psychic powers? Do you believe in the Tarot? Since God, Jesus, Aliens and Telekinesis aren’t unanimously agreed to actually exist by the scientific community and can’t be be proven in a way that satisfies the scientific community, belief in all of these things depends exclusively on a person’s direct experience.

Did you know that no one has ever seen an atom? I know, it sounds crazy but it’s true. Since the atom is the foundation for much of science, does that mean all of physics and Quantum Physics are to be declared inaccurate? Perhaps. But not necessarily. Just because an atom cannot be seen doesn’t mean we don’t experience the effects of interacting with the atom.

Just because it was not visible to everyone on Earth back in Galileo’s day that the Earth revolved around the Sun doesn’t mean they didn’t experience the effects of such reality. In fact, everyone experienced the effects of the Earth revolving around the Sun – they just attributed it to a different cause. Saying the Sun revolved around the Earth didn’t change anything but the words out of their mouths. The effects remained the same. The reason for those effects mattered not.

Scientists all agree that the atom exists despite never having seen one – they agree only by experiencing the effects of interacting with something they can’t see, but call an “atom. “All of us believe in atoms, too. We are interacting with something unseen that we call an atom. Call it an atom, magic, or call it God – either way, the point is that even hardcore science that is agreed upon by every sensible being on this planet is based upon belief. We can’t see it, but we believe it exists.

I find the atom paradox quite entertaining, as the scientific community and the religious communities all have one thing in common: both believe in something they consider to be the foundation of life, yet neither has ever seen it. One calls their building block of life the “atom” while the other calls theirs “God.”

In the end, belief is utterly unimportant. Finding what works for YOU in YOUR LIFE is all that matters. Whether you do or don’t believe in Human Design doesn’t matter. Many tools and systems exist in this world in order to help us gain a clear understanding of who we are – and no matter which systems and tools you use, all that matters is that you live a life that is pleasing to you!

Addicted to DIY – Sacral Conditioning Revealed

Woman Leaning Over the Engine Bay of a Car --- Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

I immediately tried to fix it myself. This is called sacral conditioning.

In the past few weeks I have come face to face with my own Human Design Projector conditioning in a very real and obvious way.  Take a look around this lovely website.  In the past I would have put this together myself, but since it is ultimately planned as a membership website where you can sign up and get access to exclusive content, I decided to outsource.  Then something went terribly wrong. I have a lovely site here for you, but if you tried to sign in after you register, you wouldn’t be able to get to any of the private content that’s waiting here for you.  I got scared and that’s what triggered my addiction to DIY that I got from my sacral conditioning.

I was doing so well with this old longstanding compulsion to do things on my own.  After I went through what I call “wordpress hell” earlier this year, I decided it was time to leave the complicated stuff to the experts.  So this time I thought I was handling this project more wisely when I turned it over to someone else.  But when the results didn’t work out like I had planned (partially because I wasn’t clear) I immediately jumped in and tried to fix it myself.  This is what I’m calling the “DIY addiction”.  It’s that need to push and push with energy that you don’t have, to make something happen on your own.  It comes from what is known in Human Design as sacral conditioning.  We Projectors have trouble knowing when enough is enough, when to surrender and let someone else do the work, because we don’t have consistent access to the sacral energy that guides the direction of work.  In addition, the ones who love and raised us often have sacral motors.  They would have the energy to push and work at something and do it themselves, and they also conditioned us to think we could do the same thing.  They probably also know better than a non-sacral being when it’s time to stop and let someone else do it. I was conditioned into my DIY addiction by my very resourceful Depression era Grandmother.  She had the gift of being able to turn a sow’s ear into a silk purse, and she was also probably a Manifesting Generator.  I’m a Projector with a 3/5 profile.  So I can experiment around and try a whole bunch of stuff, and usually I can get whatever I’m trying to fix to work…. but at what cost?  And that’s what I realized when I finally accepted and acknowledged my addiction to doing it myself.  In an attempt to try and save money and time, it really did cost me a lot of potential income and stress to try and fix it myself.  In the time that I was working on this site (which didn’t help at all) I could have been talking to you.  I could have been launching a new program.  I could have been resting and allowing my creative juices to flow into my plans of how I’m going to serve you next.

Well I’m finally back.  It took some time to recover.  The stress alone sapped a good chunk of life-force out of me. I have some new found wisdom about sacral conditioning and how it shows up as the compulsion to fix things on my own.  But the registration process for this site still isn’t fixed.  So that leads me to the number one lesson that all Projectors must learn in order to be successful…. ta da…. PATIENCE!!!!!!!!  We have to be patient when waiting for invitations and we have to be patient when relying on others to help us.  This is where I get to learn the second and third most important lessons for Projectors…. Clarity & Trust!  This whole experience has given me more clarity about what I want to see happen for you here, and now I must trust that it will get done in the way I have communicated.

How does your sacral conditioning show up?  Do you have the compulsion to do it yourself?  Tell me about it here…..

If you’re wondering if you can sign up for any of the membership programs which are offered the answer is a definite YES!  We’re still using the old systems, so when you sign up and pay for one of the programs, I will be there to make sure you get access to all your membership features. .  You can’t yet get into this specific site but you can still get what you need to grow and be supported!

Why Human Design Projectors Should Sleep Alone

Woman Turning Off AlarmDarn that open sacral! … And whatever other open energy centers the Human Design Projector has… If you’re a Projector who hasn’t had a good night’s sleep in ages, take a look at who you’re sleeping with.  If you share a bed with a Human Design Generator or Manifesting Generator your open sacral may not be getting the rest it needs to discharge all that energy you took in during the day.  A Generator’s sacral motor runs all the time, and even in your sleep you are prone to Generator conditioning.  What’s Generator conditioning?  It’s what happens when a Projector stands or sleeps next to a Human Design Generator.  The Projector takes in the energy of their defined sacral and amplifies it.  In the waking world, you will look like you have more energy than just about anyone else to get work done… at least for limited periods of time.  When you’re sleeping you’re obviously not working, so this excess work-force energy that you take in from your defined sacral friend, just continues to build up in your open sacral.  So when you awaken it can feel alike you never slept at all.  So what’s a Projector to do?  The best advice is to sleep alone.  What if you don’t want to sleep alone.  Well I’ve found some ways where it is possible to sleep with a Generator which I’m going to share in the next Projector Empowerment Call on September 5th 2013.

Your sleep strategy and all your self-care strategies can be fine tuned when you understand the role that your open energy centers play in your conditioning.  So sleep is just one self-care topic we’re going to discuss on September 5th.  We will explore the essentials of Human Design Projector self-care from the perspective of your open centers.  If you’re familiar with the standard list of do’s and don’ts for Projectors….

  • Sleep alone
  • Spend time alone in nature
  • Work less
  • Rest more
  • Exercise when you feel like it
  • Be mindful of your eating habits when around Generators

you won’t want to miss the discussion about how your open centers and the definition in others can affect your health and well being.

Register for the Projector Empowerment Program to Join us for:

Self-Care and Your Open Energy Centers

September 5th, 2013

Want to know more but can’t make the call?  Don’t worry all call recordings and reference materials are stored for you on your private membership page. Learn more about how the Projector Empowerment Program can support you to become the healthy, happy, fulfilled and empowered person you are meant to be.  Click Here